A Doorman and Kids

        

After completing an assignment with clients, I often step back for a while before evaluating the activities and determine the perceived value realized for those I’ve served and for myself as well.

Such is the case from my return from Cyprus where I worked 2 weeks in November.  First let me say, this was probably of the best of my six trips to this island country. The seminar was well attended by a very diverse group of professionals. They were in age, gender and industry focus. But in spite of the differences, they found common ground and were very interactive with one another in breakout groups and activities. The discussions were stimulating and even challenging at times. My on-site visits to each company who attended the seminar was charged with questions and strategic thinking for on going growth considerations. Although I received high praise from attendees through the formal evaluation procedure and by personal comments made directly to me, I never know the lasting impact I may have made during such events as this. I guess I provide value because they keep inviting me back!

One of the points in my professional purpose statement is “to have a positive impact on the lives of those God has put in my path of influence.” It was on the first day of my arrival and my last day before departure that I got a glimpse of what that might look like from two different sources that had nothing to do with anything I was getting paid for!

 When I arrived at the Hilton in Nicosia I was greeted by the doorman Yhannois. He said “welcome back Mr. Lewis.” I was surprised that he remembered me since it had been 2 years since I was last in his hotel. When he carried my bags to the room I asked him how he remembered me? Was it the gray mustache, the cowboy boots or my strange American accent? “No” he replied. He said “Sir, I have the lowest job in all of the hotel, but from the very first time you came here, you’ve never treated me like many other guests do. You have always been so very kind, friendly and respectful of me. That’s why I remember you.” Wow! We then had a great conversation about the importance of what he does as the first face of the hotel guests encounter and the value he brings to his employer.

 

My last day was speaking to over 100, 15-19 year old young people from the International School of Paphos. Although my presentation was short, I felt an immediate connection with these bright-eyed kids as they considered their future. At the conclusion of the speech, I had a line of young people waiting to ask me questions. Life questions, questions about dealing with parents, professional aspirations etc.. It was energizing for me just to be with these brilliant students.

As I discussed these events with my brother, he reminded me that we are called to be “salt and light.” It is a metaphor that Jesus used to instruct his disciples to behave in a manor in this world to be Salt and Light… To 'be salt' means to deliberately seek to influence the people in one's life through good deeds, actions and speech. Salt was a valuable commodity to enhance flavor, used as a preservative and even as a means of currency. Hence the saying in negative terms, “he wasn’t worth his salt.”  Light is a symbol used to mean awareness, knowledge, and understanding. Things are much more visible with light to illuminate it.

The best leaders I know are those who possess these characteristics. But there is also the negative effect on the lives of people. An unkind attitude, haughty behavior, dismissive actions will cause people to avoid the “darkness” you have created and loss of saltiness, leaving a bitter taste.  As a matter of fact it is described as useless and should be thrown out!

 So, leaders, stay on guard daily!

1.     Remember, you can not/not communicate. Actions, words, body language all send a signal.

2.     Don’t be a high tipper in a fine restaurant and then try and beat down or cheat a poor guy trying to make a living just so you can get a better price.

3.     Pay attention to those people you walk by every day and give little regard to. Let them know you appreciate their efforts, loyalty and value.

4.     Give away the best of who and what you are. You can’t give away what you don’t have.

5.     For my Christian friends reading this, you don’t have to get in people’s face, just show the love of Christ as salt and light.

6.     You can lose your positive effectiveness quickly. One bad moment, a poor decision or a moment of indiscretion can ruin a lifetime reputation.

A family member of mine professed to be something I’m not sure she was. She started well in life, but ultimately lost her “saltiness” and left this world with bitterness and a poor legacy in the end. Being  salt and light in a dark and distasteful world is not an occasional event. It’s a life style.

Thank you my friend Yhannois, you are more than just a doorman. Thank you young people at the International School …..you have a great future. Thanks to both for reminding that a lifestyle of “salt and light” will help me Finish Well.

Reflecting On Things That Are Important

Oswald Chambers 

Every person will, at some point in their lives, face problems and suffering. That's just the way it is in this thing called life. How people handle the difficulties is as varied as the uniqueness of mankind.

My brother offered me a great book called "Baffled To Fight Better" by Oswald Chambers. Written during WWI, Chambers reflected on the suffering of man-kind prevalent during his era and did a comparison by considering the life of a really good guy recorded in biblical history. He was  very wealthy, had a great family and was a holistic thinker and leader. You can read about him in the book of "Job."

Job was considered an upright person. An extremely Godly and religious man yet he suffered unspeakable heartache, tragic death of family members along with personal physical and financial ruin. Chambers book is not an easy read, but one that will cause deep reflection and careful thought for those who find themselves suffering and begin to ask the never ending question, WHY?

 I believe in positive thinking but some people take it to the extreme and become delusional. When a person becomes pollyannaish it does not allow for reality or the importance of grief. Chambers argues that the basis of human life is tragic, not rational.

 Over the years, I've encountered a huge number of people who are much smarter than I am in a variety of professional disciplines e.g. chemistry, engineering, medicine, finance, business, etc. But when it comes to consideration of life and death issues they become lazy intellectually. Many of them are a mile wide and an inch deep on matters that are difficult to think about. Actually, they won't think about it because it does not make them happy to do so. They will often surrender their brains to institutions, organizations or the opinions of "feel good" people e.g.  pastors or talk show folks. (Oprah, Dr. Phil, Joel Osteen, etc.)

This book is full of thought provoking statements, but the one that has caught my attention today is the catalyst for this blog post. Chambers says "It is not what a man does that is of final importance, but what he is in what he does. The atmosphere produced by a man, much more than his activities, has the lasting influence."

In our western society, the emphasis is on "what I have done" i.e. a self centered focus on accomplishments."Look at me" with little regard to the long lasting influential impact on people, organizations or society. Here are some examples.

> Listen to your favorite political leader. It's all about him/her and what they've done. Examine the narcissism of Barack Obama and Donald Trump who are perfect examples of what I'm talking about. What kind of an atmosphere have they created in the midst of their accomplishments? What have they produced for lasting influence?

> Consider your job interview or job performance review or look at your resume. Do people discuss your influence or character? Probably it's not even mentioned, but rather "tell me of your accomplishments."

> How are CEO's down to first line supervisors judged in business large and small? Take a guess.

> When proud parents are talking about their kids, what attributes do they tout? When you read the bumper sticker on their mini-van proclaiming Honor Roll Recipient, the reality never mentioned is that some of these kids are selfish, self absorbed brats and therefore such attributes are never included in the headlines.

> Even in churches, it seems that the only thing that is important is what kind of activities and programs can they implement to draw a crowd and increase the number of attendees.

As a professional businessman, as a father and husband I know I've fallen short in being a positive  influence in many ways. But reading this book has caused me to consider several thoughts in all aspects of my life. What were my accomplishments and how did that square with any influence I may have made. Does the ends justify the means, Bill Lewis, or did I leave a lasting atmosphere in my circle of influence? I'm going to share some of my questions with you and possibly you might want to consider the same for yourself.

> How do I truly want to be remembered and for what?
> Where was my greatest emphasis, results or influence?
> Was my influence net negative or positive?
> Was I willing to swallow my pride and admit when I was wrong and apologize for wrongs done to       others?
> What percentage of the battles I was engaged in was I willing to "lose" for the good of the whole? Or did I, unyielding, insist it had to be done the way I thought it should be done?
> Was I uncompromising in what I know as truth or did I cave my principles of right and wrong in an effort to "go along to get along."
> Have I brought honor or dishonor to my family? More importantly have I brought honor to the God who has given me life itself. And, have I sufficiently told others of His abiding love?
> Have I gently and compassionately engaged people I truly care about to speak truth into their life on eternal questions? Here is an example of what I'm describing.
Occasionally I've had people express their opinion of how "they" think life and the after life will probably look. Because most people are so self absorbed they kind of make up the rules as they see it. Their basic argument is "If there is a God, and if He's a good God, then he will reward people for trying to do their best. And, since I'm a nice person and generally a good person, I think I'll be ok in the end. I think I'm the kind of person God would like over all, or at least I hope so."

As I consider problems of life, suffering and influence I should be asking these important questions. I think you should too.


Sadly the theme for many people in the world today would be in concert with Frank Sinatra's "I Did It My Way" lyrics which glorifies a false and arrogant perception of a persons self worth who journeys through life with great bravado thumbing their noses at God and fellow man in this life which carry's them into eternity.

In contrast to Frank Sinatra, lets look at another guy named Solomon. He was the wisest man who ever lived and a guy who had money, women, prestige, title and unlimited power and who was continually seeking happiness and meaning.

Solomon said, "Now all has been heard; here is the conclusion of the matter: Fear God and keep his commandments, for this is the duty of all mankind. For God will bring every deed into judgement, including every hidden thing, whether it is good or evil."

As I reflect on these things during my problems and suffering I need to be holistic in my thought process and views and not compartmentalize my life. Rather than do it my way, I'll go with Solomon's approach as I strive to "Finish Well."

When Your Name Is Called

Dale Carnegie said that “There is nothing sweeter than for a person to hear their  own name.” 

William Shakespeare even asked “What’s in a name?” Well, the obvious answer is, it’s you! Your unique identity. It’s who you are, what you do, your character, behavior, values and so much more that's associated with YOU. There’s not another person in the world with YOUR name.

In early June, every year in America, the Major League Baseball draft happens affecting hundreds of young athletes. Young men who have dreamed of making it to the pinnacle of their sport, “The Big Leagues.” Over a 3 day period they intently listen to hear if their name will be called by one of the 30 professional baseball teams. As an avid fan of my Arkansas college team, it was exciting to watch 11 kids who’s name’s were called. After years of preparation and hard work, a dream come true for them when they heard “the sweetest sound…” their name.

In the past year some men and women I know and consider friends in the business world have had their names called. Just like the athletes in the sports world the

pay- off for their hard work and dedication has landed them positions of importance and influence at significant levels in their organizations. 

Some people will say that those “who’s name was called” were lucky. But as the Roman philosopher Seneca reminds us we make our own luck. He suggest “that luck is when preparation meets opportunity.” I’ve had people tell me over the years how lucky I’ve been to travel the world and do what I do. Most often I respond politely, acknowledge the compliment, but then say to myself “luck had nothing to do with it.”

But having your “name called” is not the end if a person wants to continue to excel in a successful and long-term impact on their chosen field of endeavor. Actually, it’s in many ways just the beginning. I heard someone once say that it’s not how a person deals with hardships and difficulties that determines a person of integrity and character, but rather how they handle themselves while “Living Large.”

How many professional athletes, business people movie stars and religious leaders could you cite who have fallen in disgrace because they thought because of their name, the rules of life, rule of law or business practices just didn't apply to them any longer? 

So how do you to avoid the “fall” after your name has been called? Here’s just a few check points during your journey.

1. Remember all of those who helped you along the way. Teachers, parents, friends, coaches who were with you when you were not a big deal and your name had no title associated with it. 

2. Show genuine humility. Humility is defined as “a modest or low view of one’s own importance.” A person should not think more highly of themselves as they ought to. Being haughty or prideful is a terrible and unattractive behavior. Don’t come off as a know it all.

3. There is probably nothing more devastating than having your name associated with unkindness, rudeness, arrogance or questionable behavior. Do all you can to avoid that ever happing to you.

4.  Don’t ever think it can’t happen to you, because it could. Money, fame, high lofty positions unchecked, will lead to infidelity, dishonesty, substance abuse or thinking you’re above it all and untouchable. The apostle Paul even said “…I strike a blow to my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize.”

5. Be careful with whom you associate after you’ve “made it.” Flattering words, constant adulation by other people will begin to erode your connection to reality. Those who continually tell you how great you are not really your friends. Their fans at best or manipulators and want to attach themselves to your success.

6. Seek people who will “speak truth to your power.” Throughout my career I’ve had the honor to do that as a consultant for a few leaders, but very few. Most people will listen to the good things you say, but disregard the negative. We all have good and bad characteristics, and we need to take ownership of them.

7. Remember all you did to get where you are now and then increase the effort. The long hours, hard work and the continual learning for improvement. If you’re not moving forward in your craft, you’re falling behind. There is no “treading water” in this fast paced competitive world. 

8. Seek out the view and opinions of the little guy. They live life in a world that is not as cluttered but equally as important as yours. You can learn a lot from them. What’s going well? What needs to be improved? What should I keep doing and what should I stop doing? Once you’ve received the feedback, don’t defend or justify your behavior. Accept it and make adjustments as necessary. 

9. Consider what your legacy should be. It’s not the number of home-runs you hit, the money you’ve made for the company, or how much “stuff” you’ve acquired. Your legacy will be the impact you’ve had on other human beings along your life’s journey. Good or Bad. 

10. It’s not how you start life, it’s how you finish that matters.
I could give you a very personal example of a woman who claimed to be something special all her life, but left this world with a family torn apart and a reputation which, was to some, sad, disappointing and repugnant.

When you leave this world, like it or not, your name will be called. Who will call it and what will be said on that final call, is a conversation for another time, but certainly an issue each person should ponder by asking “am I prepared when that opportunity presents itself?" Because that call is inevitable.

 The poet Nelle A. Williams penned some thoughts about our names..

You got it from your father

It may be all he had to give

So it's yours to use and cherish son

For as long as you may live

If you lost the watch he gave you

It can always be replaced;

But a black mark on your name

Can never be erased

It was clean the day you took it

And a worthy name to bear

When he got it from his father

There was no dishonor there

So make sure you guard it wisely

After all is said and done

You'll be glad the name is spotless

             When you give it to your son

As I strive to Finish Well, I personally, want to be on guard that I don’t disqualify myself 
when My Name is Called.

A Person Of Significance

For those who read my blog or have received an email from me, you know that since  November 2017 my tag line has been "Finishing Well." I use that tag line because of a man I never met. A guy who wrote a book  in the 1990's called "Half-Time." Bob Buford was an inspiration to many and his book sold millions. I was one of those who found my self stuck in the Half-Time of my life and was looking for answers to a lot of questions during  my late 40's and found profound inspiration as Bob described his own reflection in the business world. 

Mentored by Peter Drucker, this extremely successful business person determined that he wanted to go from success to significance.  He wanted to go from making money to making a difference. He began his journey by re-evaluating his life and where he wanted it to go in the future i.e., what he wanted his 2nd half of life to look like. He spent time asking basic questions which most of us miss. Simple but deep questions like,  "What do I want to be to my family? What do I want to be to my wife? What do I want to be in the industry I work in? What do I want to be in my community? What do I want to be to my God?" From those reflective questions he began charting the course of the life he envisioned it could be.

 He encouraged business people chasing life in a fast paced world to go on a personal retreat away from computers, cell phones and the busyness of life to come to grips with these important questions. I actually did that. It was one of the most meaningful "retreats" in my professional life.

Using Peter Druckers "Ten Priciples of Finding Meaning in the Second Half of Life" published by Bob, I began my own journey. I would encourage you to do your own research to the following list. 

1. Find out who you are.

2. Reposition yourself for full effectiveness and fulfillment.

3. Find your existential core.

4. Make your life your endgame.

5. Planning doesn't work.

6. Know your values.

7. Define what finishing well means to you.

8. Know the difference between harvesting and planting.

9. Good intentions aren't enough; define the result you want.

10. Recognize the downside to "no longer learning, no longer growing."

As Bob became older he could see life after the traditional retirement age and he wrote another book entitled "Finishing Well." In this book he interviewed 60 people of influence and the life they lived well past the 65 year old threshold. Again, Bob's writings impacted my thinking as I considered again the words of Drucker.

“I see more and more people who make it to their mid-forties or beyond, and they’ve been very successful,” Drucker said. “They’ve done very well in their work and career, but in my experience, they end up in one of three groups.

 One group will retire; they usually don’t live very long. 

The second group keeps on doing what they’ve been doing, but they’re losing their enthusiasm, feeling less alive. (This is where I was in November 2017)

The third group keeps doing what they’ve been doing, but they’re looking for ways to make a contribution. They feel they’ve been given a lot and they’re looking for a chance to give back. They’re not satisfied with just writing checks; they want to be involved, to help other people in a more positive way.” And they’re the ones, Drucker said, who finish well.

Bob Buford himself said “As for me, I have decided that just about all that will be left of me when I leave this earth is what I can let go of to invest in the lives of others. The fruit of my life and my work will grow on other people’s trees.”

 I'm not now, nor will I ever be a Peter Drucker or Bob Buford. I will not impact millions as they have. But, I have taken their inspirational ideas.... made them my own and applied the concepts to my own life. In addition I have taken inventory of the gifts, talents and resources I have and determined I will dedicate my life to the same purpose. To finish well for the time God grants me here on this earth. To serve others and to bring Glory to God. I want to Finish Well. 

I encourage you to buy the books by Buford and Drucker. Consider your Half-Time position or your later season of life.

Bob Buford died just a few days ago, April 18, 2018 at the age of 78. He left a lasting legacy. He Finished Well.

What's Attitude Got To Do With It?

Africa - Business Educational Forum-West Pokot, 2018

Paraphrasing Charles Swindoll's popular published statement on "Attitude" in which he suggests that circumstances, past failure and other situations people experience, i.e. education, money and other events of life are only side considerations to life's success, joy and happiness. His statement concludes. "I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it."

As a consultant who has spent a life time dealing in the realm of "Change" in corporate culture and leadership development, the past two weeks have been a case study for me on the impact attitude has on people and organizations.  

A simple definition to begin please. 

Attitude: a settled way of thinking or feeling about someone or something, typically one that is reflected in a person's behavior.

While working with organizations and individuals over the past 30 years, the excuses for why they can't  succeed have greatly outpaced the considerations of how and why they could become successful or change the culture in which they exist. Often people quit before they start because of their attitude and view of the government, the management, their family upbringing, their ethnic heritage, racial bias, economic or educational status etc.  

During my recent two weeks work in the northern region of Kenya, an area of abject poverty, I was privileged to work with business people who's outlook on life and their future was genuinely positive. To be clear, these people in many cases, are existing at the bottom two levels of the triangle of Abraham Maslow's "Hierarchy of Need Satisfaction." (google it)

These interesting and brilliant individuals are not ignorant of their circumstances, nor are they delusional about the challenges facing them. However, their attitude was encouraging to me considering the dissatisfaction of so many people I know around the world who have so much more to work with, yet appear satisfied with letting circumstances dictate their lives operating in concert with their negative attitudes. 

The group I worked with in Makutano were hard working engaged, and eager to learn. They have visions of improving, but not unrealistic expectations, because they are aware of the inherent systems and circumstances which will slow the process for them. They have no illusions of building the next Wal-Mart empire or becoming the next Bill Gates. 

So what is the reason for such an attitude? With my limited time, I had to make a quick study of it and here is my initial conclusion.

1. A prevailing evangelical Christian culture with the absolute belief that life is NOT about this world  and the stuff it provides. 

There is a huge difference between Joy and Happiness and most people can't distinguish between the two. I'm not certain I've ever met a group of people who have so little materialistically, but who are so rich in joy as these I met on this assignment. 

Now at this point in today's writing some will scoff at this notion and will agree with Karl Marks who said "Religion is the sob of the oppressed creature, the heart of the heartless world..the opium of the people." But I argue this is not religion for these people, but rather a conviction based on their unshakeable belief. 

2. An unwillingness to identify other people and systems as the enemy.

 They view government corruption and a poor economic system as hurdles to climb. They do have strong political views, but don't appear to be consumed with the differences. There have been killings during election times, but those events were more tribal differences rather than economic fundamentals.

3. Educational opportunities are sought for "practical" application to life growth, not an end- all in it's self.

4. A strong work ethic but not at the expense of family, friendships and community.

 It's what Covey describes as putting "First things First." Having the right priorities clearly identified and acted on.

5. Being "content."

A value that is missing so much with so many people. How much do you need to be content? Seems like few ever reach that level of satisfaction. When the people I worked with in Makutano die, they will take out of this world the same amount as the richest millionaire I know..Nothing! 

Like everywhere else in the world, Africa has it's issues. I think they are like Haiti and urban areas of the West in that they rely too much on the generosity and emotional sappiness of Americans. Pulling on the heart strings for those willing to give without accountability.

 But for those I worked with, that was not the case. Just some folks who want to grow their business using the resources they have and doing what they can. Because "attitude has a lot to do with it" in....... 

Finishing Well