Leadership and Success Lessons From The Taliban

 

Seventeen years ago I worked for an NGO in Kabul, Afghanistan. I was amazed then at how backward the country and the people were. I was astonished by the lack of infrastructure and the conditions the Afghan people were forced to endure in the 21st century. 

Today, I'm amazed again about this central Asian country. After 20 years of hard work, thousands of NATO lives lost and trillions of dollars spent, this country is on the threshold of returning back to its 6th century existence.

As devastatingly sad and humiliating the departure our political leaders have forced on the world, I've found myself marveling at the Taliban. The British, Russians and Americans couldn't defeat them. There's a lesson to be learned from a people who even Alexander the Great said in the third century BC "It's impossible to conquer the Afghans".

Listed are just some of lessons we can learn from the Taliban

1. Knowing who you are, what you stand for and believing in the goal.

America has lost just about everything listed. In our country today,  almost everything is "political" and confusing. While the world goes to hell we argue over "white privilege, racial identity, gender identity, critical race theory, climate, BLM, police protection, open borders and the use of proper pronouns. Really?

What exactly are our national, organizational or personal goals? What do we stand for and what is the ultimate goal? Young America knew 243 years ago, but it would be difficult to find consensus in our nation today.

2. United in purpose

Although we see the chaotic pictures on TV of Afghans at the airport, still more than 60% of the people support the Taliban. Why? Maybe because they have proved to be winners. Maybe because they understand the Taliban's unwavering purpose. Maybe it's the resolve of their leadership to accomplish that purpose. If you don't know where you're going or why you exist, failure is sure to find you, if you can't find your way.

3. Patients

When you have a proven record of success and don't abandon your core belief in the face of new challenges, good things can happen. You can afford to "wait out" the futile attempts of your competition.  I think of organizations like Chick-fil a, Hobby Lobby and others who stay with who they are in spite of public attack or  changing cultural norms. The Taliban lost many battles but patients won them the war. Again!

4. Knowing your competitors weaknesses and relying on your proven capabilities.

The greatest weakness of the Taliban's enemies (America) was the lack of determined leadership in Washington. With every new election in our country, comes a new Commander in Chief complete with a new strategy and agenda based on opinion polls and political calculations. Our brave men and women deserve better than the political class in DC.

Nations, homes and organizations who possess strong committed leadership are essential for victory.

I'm not ashamed of our country, I'm embarrassed by our leaders in DC and saddened by what we've become.

Afghanistan has never been a nation, they are and have been a collection of tribes. I fear that's what America is becoming.

Today, I pray for those who have served and for the people of Afghanistan.

The Bill and Melinda Gates Problem

 

Recently I listened to a TV commentator lament the tragic demise of the 27-year marriage of the billionaire couple Bill and Melinda Gates. 

 The commentator made an astounding proclamation.....

"The Gates raised three beautiful children, never was involved in any type of scandal, appeared quite a great couple publicly. Add to that they made billions of dollars which gave them the freedom to give away millions through their famous philanthropic foundation. They did so much good around the world."

After a pause, the reporter went on to say, " if they can't hold a marriage together, what hope is there for the rest of us?"

 

I yelled aloud my answer back to the television...(I'll tell you later what I said).

 

I applaud the generous giving this couple has provided to a number of very meaningful and worthwhile causes. Their desire to "do good" cannot be discounted.  And I hope the best for them in the future. 

 

However, like many high-profile people, they developed a "celebrity snobbery". Just because they knew how to make money and give it away does not mean they were experts in anything else (which they proclaimed to be on several topics). They preached to us about climate change, hunger, and world health diseases and how to eliminate them, but could not cure their own life. This arrogant couple lectured us, lowly mortals, on how to heal the earth, but couldn't rescue their own marriage. Why?

 

I've witnessed the same downfall in other individuals, couples, leaders, and organizations. I myself have suffered tragic failures after embracing some of the same behaviors, thinking, and attitude. I could give a laundry list of WHY, but for the sake of brevity, I'll just give ya the big one, which all others come under.

 

                              "Looking for love in all the wrong places"

 

> Love of money.." which is the root cause for all types of evil"..In many cases, having too much money is worse than not having any.

J.D. Rockefeller was once asked “How much money is enough?” He answered, “Just a little bit more.”

 

> Love of power...Longings and striving for power, status, fame, and recognition is a common feature of those in and with power who crave more. The lengths they will go to obtain more is incredible. They are often willing to forfeit all moral and ethical principles to acquire more.

 

> Love of Self.. When you think you've got all the answers, you're ripe for big troubles. "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked: who can know it?" Be careful about yourself and your motives.

Pride is an excessive preoccupation with self and one's own importance, achievements, status, or possessions.
"Pride goes before destruction and haughtiness before a fall"

 

> Love for freedom..."NO-ONE is going to tell me how to live my life. It's my body, it's my money, it's my life it's mine, mine, mine."

 

> Love with the idea of being their own god...All of the above are subsets under this one category. Since the fall of man, it's been the same story. When governing rules, commandments, precepts and principles are ignored or disregarded, you can count on a reckoning somewhere along the way. It's inescapable. We've been told clearly, “You shall have no other gods before Me."   Deuteronomy 5:7

 

So what did I say to my hotel TV Sunday morning after hearing the commentator? 

  One word --       "Meaningless"

 

The wisest, wealthiest, and most accomplished man who ever lived, tried everything he could to find happiness, meaning, and purpose during his life. He left nothing out. Unconstrained sexual adventures, work projects, education, he withheld nothing that he thought would bring him pleasure and give satisfaction. He had excessive pride and admiration of his own appearance and achievements. After every failed attempt for self-fulfillment, he proclaimed "vanity, all is vanity" which is a quality of being worthless or futile. He said in essence, it's Meaningless!

 

 He ended his lifelong search with a final conclusion which he wanted to share with us.  A statement which you and I as well as Bill and Melinda should carefully consider.....

 

"When all has been heard, the end of the matter is: fear God [worship Him with awe-filled reverence, knowing that He is almighty God] and keep His commandments, for this applies to every person. For God will bring every act to judgment, every hidden and secret thing, whether it is good or evil." 

Ecclesiastes 12:13-14 AMP

 

There is a love that is true and right. Find it and you will surely......

Finish Well!

Words Seldom Spoken By Leaders

 

I've been so very fortunate to have a career that has allowed me to speak before thousands of people over the past 30 plus years. A chosen profession that has allowed me to influence business leaders and young people in different parts of the world. I've rubbed shoulders with the wealthy, powerful, men and women in governments and business in a variety of industries around the globe. I've been given the greatest education of all by being in the presence of really smart and gifted people who are experts in their field of endeavor and I've learned so much from them. They have made me better, professionally and personally.

 

I've watched and listened to powerful people who have delivered directives, motivational and inspirational speeches. I've also witnessed unkind and destructive actions and statements hurled at their subjects.

 

As a communicator myself, I've reminded my audiences over the years of what the Australian aphorist William George Plunkett said " Three things that never come back: the spent arrow the spoken word the lost opportunity."

 

However, there are some words I seldom hear from leaders. Two words, in particular, I've rarely heard from those in authority and power which are...."I'm Sorry".

 

In our woke society, there seems to be an abundant number of people who are eager to be offended these days. As a result, we've watched celebrities and politicians issue self-protective apologies if they've been criticized for saying something others might take offense to. Some have even lost their jobs. As ridiculous as I believe that is, that is not the issue I'm focused on today. Wokeness has nothing to do with my concern in this writing.

 

I'm talking about the CEO, the line boss, the parent, the coworker the political leader who has lost their temper who’s made a decision or took action, made a curt remark, which has harmed another person. Seldom do any of these people of influence say "I'm Sorry" or "I've made a mistake" - "Forgive me". Sadly, many in positions of influence hurl destructive words carelessly just because they can and are never called out for their actions.

 

I myself can recall damaging words and actions I've distributed that now, I painfully regret.  The old rhyme we chanted as children "sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me". That's a lie! Words do hurt and may have lifelong consequences.

 

Why is it that leaders can't (or won't) simply say,  "I'm sorry" when they know they were out of line?

 

Here's is a short list of why. And I speak from experience.

 

Pride, arrogance, self-aggrandizement, cluelessness, haughtiness, indifference, detachment, callousness, hubris just to name a few.

 

I know which category I fall in.  Do you?    

 

It's never too late for you to change your behavior and speech. It may not be easy and will require an honest and disciplined life change. Here are some suggestions to consider.

 

1. Somehow, someway, find out what people think of you as a communicator. Do they consider you honest, creditable, helpful or harmful, consistent, caring, cruel, considerate, full of yourself, or mindful of others?

 

2. Become truly aware of your failings as well as your giftedness and the damage, confusion, or encouragement that may arise from your words, deeds and actions. If you are a person of influence, you'll no doubt hear of the victories, as people tell you when you've inspired or encouraged, but seldom will you hear of the damage you've done because of your careless words or attitude.

 

3. Practice the art of silence.

"Even fools are thought wise when they keep silent; with their mouths shut, they seem intelligent". Proverbs 17:28 NLT.

The day President George W. Bush was told of the 911 attack on our country he was sitting in front of a group of school children. His immediate reaction was "silence". A masterful example of a leader who took the action of inaction saying nothing until he could gather facts before speaking.

 

4. Think about the words you use. Do you communicate to impress or express? Have you developed an intellectual vocabulary that paints pictures filled with compassion and understanding? Do you genuinely understand the word you're using? In our PC culture, we misuse words routinely and intentionally to invoke emotional responses. Words like "racist" or "hero" have lost their meaning. Having a prejudice or bias does not equate to being a racist. If you are a firefighter, police officer, or nurse that does not make you a hero. You are a person doing your job.

 

5. Guard your mouth. Do you routinely use four-letter words to try and make a point? If so let me tell ya, you don't sound cool. Actually, it not only sounds dumb but also makes you look foolish, a person with a limited vocabulary who resorts to vulgarity to cover up inadequacies. You diminish yourself with foul language and you demean your listener.

 

6. Begin each day with a reflection of the previous day and consider your words carefully. Words you'll never get back once they've left your mouth.

 

Suppose

If all that we say in a single day,

With never a word left out.

Were printed each night

in clear black and white

‘Twould prove strange reading, no doubt.

And then, just suppose,

‘ere our eyes we could close,

We must read the whole record through;

Then wouldn’t we sigh,

and wouldn’t we try

A great deal less talking to do?

And I more than half think

That many a kink

Would be smoother in life’s tangled thread.

If half that we say in a single day

Were left forever unsaid.

--Author Unknown

 I must admit, I'm profoundly ashamed and embarrassed about some of the things I've said to people, be they colleagues, clients, my children or spouse, or even casual encounters. So let me say sincerely if you have been a recipient of my words or action that has caused harm or detracted from helpfulness or goodness, I'm sorry...

I'm on this journey of life just as you are and it's still my desire to ....

Finish Well.

What Will Kill America? Perspective

  I recently read a story of a clever English professor who wanted to teach her students the power of perspective.

 She walked into the class and wrote on the board: 

 

 A WOMAN WITHOUT HER MAN IS NOTHING.

 

 She picked two volunteers from the class, one man and one woman. She brought them to the front of the room, handed each of them a marker, and asked them to provide the appropriate punctuation for the sentence she had written. The young man went first. He didn't pause at all as he walked up and made three quick marks making the sentence read:

 

 A WOMAN, WITHOUT HER MAN, IS NOTHING.

 

 He stepped back smiling, confident he had aced the assignment. Now it was the young woman's turn. She approached the board shaking her head, and without hesitation she erased two of the guys marks and replaced them with the following.

 

 A WOMAN: WITHOUT HER, MAN IS NOTHING.

 

 The lesson, of course, is that two people can look at the same thing, but see two very different interpretations. It' all about our perspective: a simple change of perspective can fundamentally change our whole lives and indeed, our country.

 

So it is, in my opinion, one of the major killers of America which comes from with-in, from those so-called progressive thinkers, those who want us to believe they are the enlightened ones with their different view points. We have lost perspective on what made this country great from its inception.                                          

                                     ( There are two women in this image )

 

·                                   Perspective = Who are we? 

 

No longer are our children taught the true and complete history of our country. Instead, they are told the mistakes of our past. We live in the midst of a "cancel-culture" that's stupid in its intent and dangerous in its approach.

 

 In our personal lives, there is no such thing as "do-overs".  In the area of  finance, health, love, and relationships if you make terrible decisions you learn from those mistakes. Most likely you'll continue to live with some regret and consequences of the pain and hurt associated with your past behavior, but you can't erase it. It's still there. 

 

 Tearing down statues and eliminating words or phrases does nothing but make spoiled harmful anarchists feel like they've achieved something. We have lost perspective on who we are and what it means to be American. “I pledge allegiance……..” is being destroyed in our modern society.

·                          Perspective = Economic and Financial understanding  

Buchanan said many years ago “We will soon become a 3^rd world country if we continue to import poverty and export our good paying jobs overseas.” Witness the thousands of poor people who flood our southern boarder with little to offer to grow America and at the same time skilled jobs moving abroad. Couple that, with technology replacing jobs and what do we have left?

 

 We live in a borrowers world. The TV commercial that asks, "What's in your wallet?" suggests you may not have the right credit card. We now have two generations of financial pygmies going on three. Our legislators perpetuate the old credit card theme "take the waiting out of wanting" while raising our national debt to a point we will soon become Greece.

 There appears no end in sight to the printing of money and spending what we don't have. Proverbs 22:7 says “The rich rule over the poor, and the borrower is a slave to the lender.” China has no need to kill America with guns; they will do it with our debt to them.

 

 We are a country and an economy built on free-market capitalism. Profit is not a dirty word but rather the engine for raising the standard of living that is still the envy of the world. Government consumes wealth, it does not create it.

 Therefore those who long for greater social programs are nothing more than dreamers and freeloaders. You can't borrow your way to prosperity. There WILL be payback at some point in the future, and it will crush our economy and way of life.

 

                            Perspective = Moral Compass

With all that's already been described it is no small thing to identify how we have come to be confused with gender and sex roles, driven a wedge between races and ethnicity, and departed from all our founders considered to be scared and most important. All other issues pale to this one truth. 

 

God has given us clear instructions on how to live but we have become a nation of humanists, agnostics, and atheists. We have gone from "God Bless America" and "In God, we trust" to as President Obama's pastor who said "God Damn America." 

 

We have become to believe that life is all about us. We have lost perspective. The only perspective that matters is that of the creator of the universe the One that allows kingdoms and nations to rise and fall in accordance to His will, His honor and His glory.

 

We have been warned. 

 

"Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life." Galatians 6:7

 

This is not a religion or political game. I know many will scoff at this last point, but all else hinges on this one pivotal area in the life of America.

 

"It is a dreadful thing to fall into the hands of the living God." Hebrews 10:31

 

I fervently pray for our country as we strive to……

Finish Well

What Will Kill America? Covid - Technology -Both - Other?

 

On a recent trip to Florida, I encountered two very interesting Uber drivers. Each was a pleasant and conscientious customer-focused guy. I always love to engage people I meet about business and in particular, their work. I like to hear the stories of success, failures, and dreams for the future. Both of these gentlemen gave me a lot of information on those topics during our brief exchange during our transit through Gainesville. I’ll call them Uber 1 and Uber 2 although Uber was not their identity it was their stopgap job during these uncertain times. 

Uber 1 drove a very nice black Lincoln. When I asked him how he became a driver he explained that driving an Uber on the weekend was nothing more than escape from home. Fearing he might launch into describing an unhappy marriage or domestic problem, he quickly explained that his regular job was that of an IT problem solver and troubleshooter for a large company. Because of Covid, he is now required to work from home and the inability and opportunity to interact with people was driving him nuts. He told me “I don’t need the extra money, but I absolutely must connect with other human beings and this was an excellent vehicle for that opportunity." (See what I did there?)

 

Uber #2 was an Engineer whose company experienced a severe cutback in personnel due to loss of business since the pandemic. He described to me that as a father, needing to provide for his family (including 5 kids), “I’ve got to do something to put food on the table”… He went on to describe how technology has all but locked him out of the job market. In frustration, he told me “HR departments won’t give me a chance to show the kind of guy I am or the value I can provide. All they look at is the on-line resumes. If they contact me at all, they tell me I’m overqualified. I know that!          But I’ve got to feed my family. I can’t get a face-to-face interview with anyone! It’s so frustrating!”

 

As a business professional who has delivered speeches and taught classes around the world, I know the power of live feedback from the audiences and robust dialogue with differing opinions. Zoom calls and meetings, virtual sales presentations, or staff reviews can NEVER have the same impact as in-person communication.

 

I read recently that McDonald's is exploring a new drive-through experience by replacing inside dining with robots who will take your order as you pass the drive-through window and a conveyor belt system that will then deliver your meal to your car.

Will it be efficient? Sure. Will it be a cost-saver for the company? Absolutely.

 

Big tech already has a substantial influence on just about every aspect of our lives.  In addition to automation, big tech methods have flooded our computers and social media with advertisement, marketing, and now monitor “speech” determining what is deemed acceptable and what must be censored.

 

My granddaughter is a member of her high school debate team which I fear is a futile exercise.  The increasingly open and free debate has become unacceptable by particular groups in the public square and is becoming a thing of the past. Her debate team will no doubt benefit from exercising her mental capacity by viewing issues from different perspectives, but she best not try expressing those opinions in real life. Having an opposing opinion on the wrong side of a political persuasion will be detrimental and won't be tolerated. The "speech police" are listening.

 

EVERYTHING has become political. Speech control will ultimately lead to thought control. And this control will/is permeating our education, political, and business institutions.

 

As real and tragic as Covid is, it has become sadly, a means of population control and speech control and is accelerating big tech's domination over human interaction. Communication freely expressed differences of opinion, has been part of what has made American enterprise so successful and we may be in danger of losing it.

 

I’ve witnessed firsthand speech and thought control and the effects on people in Eastern Europe and Russia which continues to paralyze every system with-in those countries at some level even today. It’s beginning to look the same in our country. Just observe for yourself as you walk through businesses, your Wal-Mart store, or down the streets of certain cities in the U.S.. It all reminds me of Pink Floyd’s video “Another Brick in the Wall”. I've seen those same faces on the streets of Moscow, and unfortunately, I’ve seen those faces in manufacturing firms and corporate offices throughout the U.S.

 

One of the questions we must ask is will artificial intelligence change what it means to be human? Have we lost the capacity to be curious about people? Have we abandoned the art/skill of listening for understanding? Have we cooped our lives to government restrictions on movement for social or business gatherings? Will there be no end to algorithms determining what to buy, who to love (see on-line dating sites), or who to hire through HR software? Will we continue to stop thinking but rather give our minds over to social media, university professors, cable news, government officials, and artificial intelligence to do it for us?

 

Neil Postman, Amusing Ourselves to Death observed.....

“Orwell warns that we will be overcome by externally imposed oppression. But Huxley’s vision, no Big Brother is required to deprive people of their autonomy, maturity, and history. As he saw it, people will come to love their oppression, to adore the technologies that undo their capacities to think”

 

So is it too late? Probably, but you and I can delay it some.

 

This is for the American business community. Keep in mind one important fact. America IS exceptional. It has always been exceptional from its beginning. It is still described as a great experiment because no other nation can fully duplicate what we’ve done. Nations still want to know how we built the largest economy in the world and are still looking to what we do next. Knowing that and fighting for that will help keep us from becoming  “one more brick in the wall” of groupthink through globalization.

The following are suggestions on how to do that..

 

1.     The overarching requirement for success is building relationships. It’s Relationships First, then success. I’ve been preaching this for 30 years and have shown people and institutions how to do it.

2.     Get back on the road and contact your customers! Search for new ones. Most of your competitors will be stuck behind their Zoom screen. People are starving for human interaction. No advanced technology can replace or have a greater impact than employees with customers.

3.  Maintain a vibrant means of getting opinions and suggestions for improvements from customers and employees. (and please, don’t use computerized survey’s) Go TALK to people!

4.     Voice your opinion in city hall meetings, the PTA, church, and let others do the same.

5.     Before embracing additional technology consider the cost.

For many years I've discussed with my clients COI (The Cost of Improvement) and EC (Error Cost or if you will, the cost of doing the wrong thing). Although most of our calculations dealt with financial considerations, there are some things that do not have an immediate monetary equation. Give consideration to what you will lose by purchasing the next artificial intelligence system i.e. will we lose the soul of our company, will we lose what it is to be human.

In future blog articles, I will expand the challenges and remedies necessary for abating the death of America.  

 

Don’t let yourself or your organization become just "Another Brick In The Wall”….. Rather, do your part to ensure that you and your institution.....

Finish Well

Press On....

 For those who have received an email or letter from me or read an article I've published in the past 25 years, you've seen this salutation appearing at the close of each writing.... "Press On"

 

I confess that this was not original with me. I actually pinched this thought from a friend of mine who ended his email with the same phase. I don't know his motivation for using this salutation or what he was thinking about, but I know mine (I'll share that with you shortly).

 I also don't know how my readers interpreted the phrase as they read it. I would be interested to hear from those who would like to share what they were thinking, if anything, about that closing phrase.

 

There is an idiom used by coaches of American football in which they exhort their players to "strain through the play". The idea is to push through their assignment regardless of the resistance of the opposition, how exhausted they might be or the difficulty of the circumstances they face.

 

The encouragement to "strain through" or to "Press On" could not be more appropriate for 2020.

 

It has been said, “How frail is humanity! How short is life, how full of trouble!" We've certainly seen that in 2020!

Covid-19, the election results, the prospects of more governmental intrusion, higher taxes, health concern for your-self or someone you care about, finical difficulties affecting you personally or your business, broken or lost relationships, being shut in or shut out of normal life experiences, total change in what you considered "normal"...... All are depressing and daunting battles we all might face.

 

So, how do you "Press On" in times like this? Just hearing from some guy on the other side of a blog post admonishing you to "pull up your bootstraps" or  "stay positive" is not much help. However, there are some key principles and practices, which I believe, are helpful to consider and is the bases for my initial exhortation to Press On, which I used to end my writings.

 

This is not an exhaustive list for sure rather it is selective. These suggested principles have aided me personally during the most challenging and difficult season of my life these past 2 years.

 

Ø Know who you are i.e. what is your identity? At the core, who are you?

 

Here are some questions to answer in that process. 

 Who is really in charge?

What's your conviction about life and death?

What determines your happiness?

Where does your hope for the future rest?

What is wealth and prosperity to you and how do you acquire it?

What is your responsibility to others?

 How do you cope with troubles in life?

What is so important to you that if you lost it, would be a devastating blow to you and your life?

 

Ø Understand and Practice proper techniques consistently....

 

Practice does not make perfect. Perfect Practice makes Perfect.

 

Therefore devote your self to study, discovery and discipline regardless of the subject. Leadership, Financial acumen, physical fitness, spiritual renewal etc.

 Growth does not just happen because you wish it. It takes concentrated effort.

 

Ø Don’t beat yourself about past failures or get a big head about your success yesterday... There are no "re-do's" in life or actions of the past and there is no promise of tomorrow. But, there is hope for today.

 

This bit of history of the past has relevance for today.

 

The Apostle Paul used the phase " Press On" while teaching others in the city of Philippi. Before he was the famous Paul he was very influential in his time under the name of Saul.

 

Saul committed many terrible acts toward those who claimed to be Christians. He, like other mortal men made some horrendous mistakes in his life. Then he encountered God first hand and as a result of his conversion answered the question I posed above. Additionally he began to practice a new way of thinking and living.

 

After many years of these applied disciplines he made this profound declaration showing humility and resolve as he helped others learn how to live...."Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect...but one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

 

Like Paul, I've fallen and failed in almost every aspect of my life. Being honest, I'm embarrassed and grieved about my shortcomings because of the pain, shame and disappointment my actions have caused.

 

But failure does not need to be fatal. There is nothing I can do about my past failures or even my success's. Today, like Paul, I'm resolved (with God's help) to forget what's behind me and "Press On" to the life that's been promised to me.

 

You can too, but it will require a change of thinking and behaving. Parenthetically, that has been the sub-title of my "Change Management" strategy for organizations over the past 30 years.

 

The Thanksgiving holiday in the US is completed, Christmas is ahead of us and then...2021. No doubt we all will face new challenges and new opportunities in the days to come. How will you handle it?

 

For me, at this stage of life, not only will I Press On, I will strain through this thing called life by revisiting the principles and practices described.... because I truly desire to....

Finish Well