While many will
embrace books like “The 7 Habits of Highly Successful People” (a great book by
the way) and other “how to” books for success, few will look at their organizations critically and determine what not to do.
On occasion I have been accused of being negative or being a consultant just looking for
problems. Although I can see how that might be true
in the eyes of the insecure manager or protectors of the status quo, the fact
is I seek both the good and bad in the company cultures and prescribe needed
adjustments to move and align the organizations for success.
Using my list of those do’s and dont’s listed in part #1, I
now move to a different subject title for your consideration.
Don’t be un-kind.
Seems
like a no brainer right? The fact is there are some places that have become places where being unkind is at best ignored, at worst part
of the organizational culture. Often this unhealthy behavior manifests in a few not so subtle
ways.
1.Words. Dismissive, condescending,
critical, vulgar, accusatory, angry words.
I was asked by an organization to view a new acquisition of
theirs to determine it's existing company culture. When I returned to the home office and met with the Corporate HR people, I told them I could sum up the culture in one word.
“Un-kindness.” The way people treated each other was appalling. The language
they used in meetings, and in the hall ways was unbelievable to me. It was not
always an “in your face” approach, but you got the message by tone, body
language in addition to actual spoken words.Sadly I’ve witnessed this much to often. I worked with a CEO many years ago who I thought was one of the best salesman and leaders of a large organization I had ever seen. To this day, I still use some of the principles learned from him. However he had one huge character flaw.
When he was done with you, he turned
on you in ways that were very unkind, sometimes destructive. He would talk
about you to others in the most disparaging ways. He had an ego that was so big
he was unwilling to give others consideration for success apart from himself.
In another example I have a good friend who
has dedicated many years of service to his organization. Over time new managers with new philosophies have entered the business. As a result, this well meaning
dedicated employee has suffered a slow death at the hands of un-kind managers.
Twisting in the wind, he has become tortured by un-kindness by many top
executives (and of course, a bunch of little VP’s who have joined the parade of
unkind behavior hoping to gain favor in a sucking up posture). Co-workers in this business pass this guy in the hall way and
purposely do not make eye contact or acknowledge his existence.
I’ve often
wondered the motive for turning so ugly on this guy. Is it to justify their
decision? Is it an effort to build themselves up by tearing someone else down?
Sad! They could have shown much more compassion
by just terminating him years ago. The puzzling part of the story is he’s received
great performance reviews for years.
Years ago it was my job to terminate a person who had
outlived his effectiveness at our company. Bob was a great guy, but just didn’t
fit any longer. I called Bob into my office and told him “Bob. You’re a good
guy and good at what you do. However, what you do we don’t need done anymore so
I’m going to let you go. But to let you know it’s not personal I’m going to pay
you for 6 months until you find another job. There’s only two things you have
to do to earn that pay check. 1. Don’t come to building again and 2. Don't call
here.” Although his pride was understandably bruised for a time, he got over it
and even called me years later to thank me for the way I handled that difficult
process.
Two final examples, and with this, I close.
1.
Today I heard from a very successful women who
is the manager operating in the retail industry. She oversees one
store location with many employees and their store scores in the top 10% in the
region in sales and profitability. During the companies regional managers
meeting this week, she described how the “corporate” people are always looking for what
is wrong, rather than encouraging you for things done well. It seems to me that low level corporate people think their task is to try and keep
people on edge, making them wonder where they stand. How sad. How un-kind.
So
called leaders like this believe that somehow their dismissive comments will
motivate people to do better. Leaders should be encouragers lifting others up.
Leaders should be coaching for improvement not criticize for effect.
2.
Two weeks
ago I was in Senegal W. Africa, witnessing a management team who work with
local farmers teaching them how to grow crops in a desolate, desert region of the world. As it was
described to me by one of the leaders, “We want to not only teach but we want to
show our employees and community how we treat each other. How we treat and
protect the land and our animals. We are living
an example, not just telling.”
Wouldn’t it be great if we lived the “Value Statements” that
hang on our company walls? Wouldn’t it be wonderful to show kindness for a
truly healthy organization?
Leaders, Finish Well!!!
